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Principles of a Happy Marriage – Study 3- The gender issue

Thank you for the comments received on my last article regarding gender. I apologise for not explaining. You see, I’m a man. All my experiences have been from that perspective. When I teach, I like to teach from personal experience, and though I can tell you what the Bible says about the woman’s roll in marriage, I am not able to minister that with conviction as I have never experienced what it must be like to submit to a husband. I can only say what it is like for me as a husband to have a wife who is a strong person – a teacher in her own right – but who voluntarily places herself in submission to me. And yes, her actions have been a large part of the reason why we have a successful and peaceful marriage.

Again, I must emphasise that our success is not because we are such great people – because we’re not. We are just very ordinary folk with a simple home – our choice. The success has all to do with a great God who designed marriage and wrote down the principles of marriage in His Word – the Bible. We have simply followed the rules.

50/50


Speaking of gender, though, I must say that I do not agree with the common philosophy that marriage is a 50/50 thing. I understand by that philosophy, that each partner should contribute 50% to the marriage. I believe, rather that marriage is a 100/100 thing. To me, the 50/50 thing sounds too selfish. I have given my 50%, now where is yours? There is no man or woman alive who can with all honesty say that they are always feeling 100%, and therefore always able to contribute their share fully. Consequently, if each share is only 50%, and the day comes when you are feeling weak for some reason or other and can’t make up your full share, there’s a problem in the home.

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